The Green Eyed Monster

This time of year, it’s difficult for kids to fight the envy and jealousy that can overcome them like the waves on the sand. With advertisements bombarding us from all angles telling us how much happier we’d be if we only had X, it’s no wonder children have trouble with giving and not getting during the month of December.

Image courtesy of Grant Cochrane/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

But don’t despair! There are some things parents can do to help kids keep that green-eyed monster caged.

1. Focus on the season, not the gifts. Yes, it’s hard to not think about what you want for Christmas! However, if we as parents only talk about the buying, wrapping and distributing of gifts, we’re showing our kids that the most important thing about this time of year is the presents. Make sure the intangibles, such as visits with far-flung relatives, decorating the tree as a family, and giving to someone else in need, are front and center with the gifts taking second place.
2. Stack your time with family-oriented, free events. Devise a game to see who can come up with the best free, holiday-themed outing for the entire family. Things like driving around the neighborhood to look at the lights or visiting the mall only to see the displays can be fun things that don’t cost anything.
3. Have a “I’m thankful for…” jar. Decorate a container with an open lid and put it on the kitchen counter labeled “What I’m thankful for....” Provide a pen and slips of paper for family members to jot down their thoughts in words or pictures. Then pick a night in December to sit around the tree and read the notes.
4. Make thank you notes a part of the season. We have a motto about thank you notes: If you can’t write the note, you don’t keep the gift. That has kept complaining pretty much nonexistence and it has helped them to remember that someone took the time to buy that present especially for them.

The main thing is to think back to your own childhood Christmases. What brings a smile to your face today? Was mostly specific presents? Or was it the memories of making gingerbread with your grandmother, the crisp winter air that tingled your nose as you went caroling with your siblings, or the laughter as you played a family game? Remembering that those are the kind memories your children will cherish can help you not get carried away by the material aspects—nice as they are—of this season.

How do you help your children not be consumed by the green-eyed monster?

Until next time,

Sarah

Early in 2014, Sarah and Mary Elizabeth Peritti will speak on Parenting With Love & Leadership in a four-part webinar series. Contact Sarah through her website for more information.