School Year Resolutions

Many of us make New Year’s Resolutions, and with the start of a fresh school year, I propose parents write some New School Year Resolutions of their own. Here are a few New School Year Resolutions every parent should have.

Resolution 1. I will not complain about my children’s teachers. This means, you will speak well of their teachers, not ill. That publicly and privately you will not disparage their teachers, especially in front of them or within their hearing. By the very position as a teacher in your child’s school, that person deserves your respect.

Resolution 2. I will take the teacher’s word over my child’s. This used to be commonplace in American homes, that if a teacher said a child had misbehaved, the parent would believe the teacher over any protestations from the child, knowing that a child is an unreliable witness to situations in which he has a stake. Make it clear from the outset that you will not tolerate misbehavior in the classroom and that it’s your child’s responsibility to learn how to get along with any “difficult” teachers, much as it is with any “wonderful” teachers.

Resolution 3. Homework is the sole responsibility of my child. In other words, you as a parent should not take the onus of getting homework done on your shoulders. “But what if my child doesn’t do her homework?” you ask. That’s the teacher’s responsibility to address. If the teacher gives a poor grade on uncompleted homework, then your child will suffer the consequences. If the teacher makes your child sit out recess to finish her homework in class, then your child will suffer the consequences. The only responsibility you have as a parent in regard to homework is to make sure your child has a place to do it. That’s it. Other than that, leave the homework to the child. After all, as I tell my kids, I have already passed elementary school.

Resolution 4: I will not bring homework, musical instruments or lunches to school when my child has left them at home. It is the child’s responsibility to make sure he leaves for school with all the things he needs that day. The parent who takes that responsibility on herself of bringing a left-behind item to school later is not helping her child learn that responsibility. It’s better to have a child figure out how not to forget things early in life than later in life. Less stress on the parent, too.

For our family, this week heralds the dawn of a new era with all four kids in school full time for the first time. I’m sure there will be missed lunches, forgotten worksheets and tired bodies at some point this year. But I know that with practice, our kindergartener, first grader, fourth grader and fifth grader will develop their own routines for handling school assignments and will figure out how to get along with their teachers. After all, school is but a preview of life, and the more responsibility we give our children, the more opportunities they have to shine and grow.

Until next time,

Sarah